I am crying less…
…a lot less…
You see, over the past few weeks – in spite of the difficult news we recently received – we have come face-to-face with all kinds of reasons to be thankful…and we have been gifted with many moments where we have been able to rejoice.
Some of these moments have come to me when I’ve purposefully chosen to say no to grief and embrace the alternative…and some of these moments have just happened.
Without me even having to try, I have been able to feel joy…true joy that only comes from the Father. I can not tell you how thankful we have been for this specific gift.
How have I been able to smile in the middle of such a difficult circumstance? Because of Him. There is simply no other explanation.
We have felt His joy…We have sensed His presence…We have held tight to His faithfulness…and we have experienced His peace.
Day by day, He is giving us the strength to deliberately choose to reject despair and embrace a spirit of celebration.
We do not believe that God makes mistakes, and we refuse to act as if He has. We believe that God’s ways our higher than our own, and we have chosen to eagerly embrace His plan for our family. We understand that our earthly perspective is skewed, and while we long for the day when we will see through the glass clearly, we are celebrating the gift of our girl. She is exactly who God created her to be, and we love her. We love all of her.
We feel incredibly honored that she has been placed in our family, and instead of the tears that seemed like they would never stop, do you know what you would see if you peeked in to our home these days?
You would see a daddy who continues to be madly in love with his little girl.
You would see a mama who is humbly thanking God for giving her the privilege to steward our sweet girl’s life.
You would see two little boys who simply can’t stop giving hugs and tisses (yes, tisses) to their sister.
You would see leftover balloons [and an empty brownie pan] where we recently celebrated Sissy’s clean echo-cardiogram.
You would see a little girl who grasps toys…and rolls from side-to-side…and laughs when she’s tickled…
…a little girl who just this weekend tried her first bites of baby cereal…
…a little girl who smiles every time we sing to her…
…a little girl who has changed us…
…and if you ever have the privilege of receiving one of her million-dollar smiles, you will have no doubts when I tell you that she is more beautiful than anything I could have ever imagined.
Majesty and mercy, meet me in this moment – How can it be that I have been chosen by the King?